Step 1 - abstinence (e.g. fasting) - abstain from lawful things (i.e. food, drink, sex, films, etc) for a time. By removing the desired thing from our lives, we are slowly reducing its pull on our desires. Weakening the desire so we can easier overcome it. This eventually trains our hearts to overcome the vines of desire tugging at our hearts. This is one wisdom behind fasting.
Step 2 - ascetisism (zuhd) - we have such a control over our own hearts that we can interact in normal society outwardly (i.e. eat, drink, have sex, watch films) but we are not being pulled by these things..by our vines of desires...and thus inwardly we are not doing these things from pleasure but rather as a neutral act..like any other act ...if we wish to stop the act midway we are able to without thinking twice (this will be different to one who is unable to stop since they are eating, drinking, etc out of pleasure and indulging in desires)
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